You can handle it.

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You can handle being healed…

I was talking to a friend, and she said these words to me. “Nicole, you can handle being healed.” I stopped her mid-sentence. Wait! Ma’am! What you say?

So, here’s the thing. I have been on this journey to healing and wholeness. I’ve been asking God, what does that look like? How will I act? Who will I be? What will change?

Trauma, pain, sadness, low self-esteem, insecurity, isolation, etc. becomes comfortable when that’s all you know. It effects the way you view your life, your relationships, other people… It’s all a smoke screen. It doesn’t allow you to see life clearly.

Yes, it’s hard work. Yes, it is so uncomfortable. I admit, there is fear in the unknown. Who am I without pain? How will my perspective change once the negative thoughts that have become my friends are evicted from my mind? What will I think about? Who will my new “friends” be? (Can you tell I overthink?)

No one can give me the blueprint of how it’s going to look and, as much as I would like to know, the date when the project of rebuilding my life will be complete. Note to self: settle in sis, for the rest of your life you will be evolving, growing, changing, rebuilding – constantly under construction. Learn to enjoy the beauty of each season.

I think I will. How about you? Let’s make this resolve together: I resolve to go through my journey and trust that God will never leave me. I don’t know what the journey cost me, but I know the payoff is priceless. I resolve to stay in the fight. Though bruised and scarred, I will win.

I stand in strength.

Knowing God made me who I am.

He doesn’t waste His energy on anything or anyone that is not of value.

I can do this.

I will stand.

I will fight.

I am more than a conqueror.

I am an overcomer.

The pressure will not break me.

I will not be silent.

He created me for greatness.

I am whole.

I am prosperous.

The victory is mine.

I am an overcomer.

Nothing Wasted

Happy Monday, Overcomers!

Today is a good day, so let’s make the most of it.

I want to share about a book I’m reading called “Hinds Feet on High Places,” by Hannah Hurnard. I read this book years ago, but I felt a strong urge to pick it up again last week. Truth is, I don’t remember most of what happened, so it’s like reading it for the first time.

I won’t tell the story, but in the beginning of the story, the “Good Shepherd” tells Much-Afraid (yes that’s her name) that nothing he and his father makes is wasted.

This is what I want you to know today:

Nothing the Father creates is a waste; neither is it worthless. You are supposed to be here. You are loved. You are worth it. You are enough. God loves you.

Come on now, get up.

You can do it. Keep pushing. Your future is cheering for you!

Affirmed.

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Hello, Overcomers! How are you? For the past few weeks, I’ve been digging into the word affirmed. I never really gave this word much thought. Nor did I ever contemplate its full meaning. This is what I’m tapping into on this journey…

The first time I heard the word “affirmed,” was about twenty years ago. I can hear her say it, “God says, ‘I affirm you.’” It was in the late nineties during Mrs. Serita Jakes’ first Woman to Woman conference. She made this declaration as she ministered. I didn’t like it. I didn’t know why, but I didn’t. It didn’t sound good to my ears – at all. Although the announcement knocked at the door of my heart, I didn’t know how to receive it.

Twenty-plus years later, this word is part of my daily affirmations. How “like God” is that? When I think of affirmations, I think of positive statements that I say over myself in alignment with what God says about me.

Wait a minute! God is saying something about me! I never processed the weight of that thought until I wrote it! WOW!! – – Guess what? He’s saying good things!

Let’s look at the word affirmation. In the Webster’s Dictionary, this is what it says:
-To say that something is true in a confident way.
-To show a strong belief in or dedication to.

I’m excited because affirm is a verb. That means it’s an action word. God is affirming me. He has affirmed me. And He will affirm me. In my past, I was affirmed. In my present, I am affirmed. In my future, GOD. AFFIRMS. ME.

What does this mean? According to the definition of affirm, He is confidently speaking the truth about me. He can’t lie, so whatever He says concerning me is truth. It also means He has strong belief in me. Not only that, but He is dedicated to me! He’s dedicated to His word over me! He loves me! According to Jeremiah 1:12, He is watching over His word to perform it! He’s performing it for me, in me, and through me!

Whatever God has promised gets stamped with the Yes of Jesus. In him, this is what we preach and pray, the great Amen, God’s Yes and our Yes together, gloriously evident. God affirms us, making us a sure thing in Christ, putting his Yes within us. By his Spirit he has stamped us with his eternal pledge—a sure beginning of what he is destined to complete. 2 Corinthians 1:20-22 MSG

For all of God’s promises find their “yes” of fulfillment in him. And as his “yes” and our “amen” ascend to God, we bring him glory! Now, it is God himself who has anointed us. And he is constantly strengthening both you and us in union with Christ. He knows we are his since he has also stamped his seal of love over our hearts and has given us the Holy Spirit like an engagement ring is given to a bride—a down payment of the blessings to come! 2 Corinthians 1:20-22 TPT

“The Will”

Happy Monday, Overcomers! It’s a great day, yes?

In my normal fashion, I’ll jump right in. A will is a legal document that indicates how a person wants his or her money and/or property to be distributed after death.

We know that God has a will for us. We know that the earth and everything in it belongs to Him. We also know that He’s alive. He died, but He rose again.

Isn’t it amazing to know that God our Father has left us an inheritance that we have access to now, and He’s not dead!

Today I want to remind you of your inheritance. God wrote a will, and all you have to do show up to the reading in order to recieve it.

How do you show up? I’m glad you asked. Right where you are, in your home, at your desk, in your car or wherever you are. All you have to do is submit your life to Christ, read the will (the Bible), and ask God what His plans are for you.

Knowing that you have an inheritance gives your life meaning. It gives you something to look forward to. Will you commit to finding out God’s will for your life?

I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.Jeremiah 29:‬11 MSG

May your Kingdom come soon. May your will be done on earth, as it is in heaven.
Matthew 6:10 NLT

The “Fussing Auntie”

Happy Tuesday, Overcomers!

Today, I want to ask you (us) to be kind to yourself.

The same grace and forgiveness that you extend to others? Extend it to YOU.

The same way you extend a pass to others for being human? Extend it to YOU.

Stop being your own hater.

Stop being your own enemy.

Stop putting yourself down.

Start building yourself up.

Start affirming yourself.

Start applauding yourself.

Starting telling yourself, “I can do it.”

Start pursuing your best version of yourself.

I’m wearing the “fussing Auntie” hat today. And while I’m fussing at you, I’m fussing at me, too.

I’m finished fussing now. (smile)

I want to see you win. I want you to have the best. I want you to be the best version of you possible. You have permission to live!

Whispers

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Happy Tuesday, Overcomers! I know I’m a day late, but I pray that today’s post will be worth the wait.

So, I made a Facebook post a couple of weeks ago that I want to talk about. Here’s the post:

There’s a voice in your head that plays life a broken record. It says, “you’re wasting your time, so, why bother?” It’s so frustrating, right? It’s like having two people in your head. Meanwhile, the second voice is pushing you towards purpose. This voice is starting to be more influential than the other. It’s not louder, but the weight of the assignment is more influential and more meaningful than the voice that’s telling you to sit down, shut up and give up. Let the weight of the second voice lead you to your destiny.

It seems like the negative voice is always yelling at you, while the voice of purpose whispers. What I’ve come to understand is that when a person or situation is “yelling” at you, it is vying for attention or authority. See, the voice of purpose (God) is the final authority and He has no reason to yell or force His thoughts or intentions on you.

Furthermore, we have to decide which one to feed. If we feed the voice of purpose, we will learn to rise above the noise and chatter of negativity. I don’t know that the chatter of negativity will ever be silent, but it will no longer have any authority in your life.

Thought for today:

Have you ever been around someone who is so focused on a task that they don’t hear the noise and the conversation going on around them? Have you ever been that focused on something?

My prayer and my hope for you today is that you would be able to focus on your healing, your future, your health, and every good thing that life has to offer you. I pray that you will be able to focus to the point that every day you will find the strength and the determination to try again. And again… And again…

Mirror, Mirror

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It’s Monday again, Overcomers! Did you have a great weekend? I pray so.

If you were in an abusive relationship, would you get out of it as quickly as possible? If someone were disrespectful to you would you let them know? Maybe have a conversation with them? Maybe find out if there’s a misunderstanding?

You’d make steps to remove yourself from an abusive relationship – especially the person perpetrating the abuse, right? So what if that person is you?

As we jump into the new week, I want to ask you to consider how you’re treating yourself. Can you sit down and have a talk with yourself?

What do you tell yourself about your future? What are you telling yourself about your worth? What you deserve? What you don’t deserve? When you look in the mirror, what are you telling yourself?

I want to encourage you by saying this: God doesn’t change His mind about you. His love doesn’t run out, and you are worth the fight it takes for your future.

Thought for today:

The last couple of weeks, I’ve felt like I was at war in my mind. It was as if the right side of my brain was fighting with my left. The right side was saying, “Go for it. You can do it! God put the desire in you to help others.”

At the exact same time, the left side was saying, “What’s the point? Nobody wants or needs your help. You don’t have anything to offer.” #sigh

While I was starting to believe that voice on the right, that left side was irritating me and I wondered if I was going to make it out of the day with my brain intact.

I woke up this morning deciding I was not going to be the one who continued to abuse me. I made a commitment to myself to treat myself with honor, integrity, respect and love. I believe God wouldn’t have it any other way.

Will you make a commitment with me today? To your future? To stay in the fight? To stay on the journey? We’re in this together.

Work Your Process

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Happy Monday, Overcomers! It’s that time again!

I had a weird experience yesterday that I want to tell you about. I was driving down a back road in Georgia (I wasn’t speeding this time), and I noticed a car behind me and he swerved a little, venturing a little off the road. If you know anything about back roads in Georgia, you know that you don’t have a lot room for error.

The road switched to two lanes and the driver passed me. I slowed and stayed a good distance behind him because I saw him swerve a couple more times and veer just off the edge of the road.

I began praying for the driver. I asked the Lord to protect him and help him make it home safely. I prayed that whatever his physical or mental condition was that he would make it home safely. I prayed for the angels to protect him and guide him safely home. I prayed for his peace and his salvation. In that moment, I felt the weight of this man’s life.

This is how I see you, beloved. I see you headed toward your destination. You are on your journey towards healing and wholeness. I see you swerving a little. I see that you get tired sometimes. I see that you sometimes feel hopeless in the process. I’m praying for your strength. I’m praying for your faith. I am praying for your life, your purpose. Don’t give up. Keep working your process. Your best days are ahead of you. It will be worth it in the end!

Thought for today:

Make sure you are healing and not just growing accustomed to the pain.

When a person has surgery, the doctor may tell you to wait six weeks before participating in certain activities. By week three, you may feel good enough to move furniture, but know that when/if you do, you will injure yourself, and could possibly end up back in surgery or in worse condition.

Work your healing process. Pay attention to your heart, mind, spirit, and body. Be healed. Be delivered. Be set free.

Remember, God loves you.
I love you.
You are loved.
You are worthy of love.
No matter who dropped you, God willingly picks you up.

My Protector

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Happy Friday, Overcomers!

I’m my early twenties, I had a dream that I will never forget. I was in a corner store, and someone came in shooting. As I stood frozen in fear, bullets were hitting me but bouncing off me and hitting the floor. All I kept hearing in my ear was, “No weapon formed against you will prosper,” which is found in Isaiah 54:17. I did not know at the time that weapon formed against me was me.

Years later, I reflect often on this dream. I reflect on a loving Father that saved me from myself –  how He protected me. He saved me from the way I felt about myself. The way I felt about life. I’m not going to ever lie to you and say that it’s all been perfect. It’s not going to happen in a blink of an eye, but through process and work, you will get there.

It will get better. Every day is not going to be a bed of roses. Matter of fact, if you know anything about roses, you know that there are thorns on the stem. But they’re still beautiful, yes? So, I want to encourage you on this journey that we are on, that though there are thorns, the roses (your life) is still beautiful. You are beautiful. You are worth the time invested in you by your loved ones. You are valuable. You are loved. You are enough.

Thought for today:
I’m thankful that you are reading this blog. I am thankful that you have decided to give life another try.

As you head into the weekend, will you do me a favor? Have some fun. Hang out with some friends. Get some sun. Allow someone to show you some love. I look forward to speaking to you Monday.

Feel free to inbox me. Check out my FB page, The Life of an Overcomer.
Have a great weekend!

 

Tough Love

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Hello, Overcomers!

 Are you in counseling? Do you have people in your life that can tell you the truth? It’s important for your success.

One of the things that I learned when I first started counseling was about cognitive distortions. In other words, irrational thinking.

What my counselor would do was ask me about how I was processing or perceiving my life or a situation. If my thoughts were irrational, she would say, “how did you come to that conclusion?” or, “You made a mistake; however, that does not make you a failure.” or “Do you realize that was an irrational thought?”

So, for a little tough love today, I want to encourage you to allow people to confront your irrational thinking – My life is over! I’m a horrible person. I’m never going to get over this! I’m stupid! I’m never going to get better! – These are all examples of irrational thinking. (Remember our affirmations?)

I want to give you some food for thought regarding counseling. If all you do is sit on a sofa or chair and talk, but never gain any coping skills, emotional management skills, or tools to do life as “normal” as possible (I use that term loosely) then I would like for you to reconsider your therapist or counselor.

If your “squad” never confronts you or challenges you, push you, or encourage you to do better, be better, and have better? Chances are you might be in the wrong squad.

Thought for today:
When I was in college, my intent was to come a Social Worker. The theme of Social Work was to empower.

To empower someone means to give (someone) the authority or power to do something. It also means to make (someone) stronger and more confident, especially in controlling their life and claiming their rights.

This is (in my opinion) the point of having a counselor, therapist, or even your friends. I believe that we should all be empowering someone in life.

I pray that through your encounters, whether it be your peers or professional counseling, that you would be made stronger and more confident about your life and your future.