“Default Settings”

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If you’ve ever worked on a computer or a cell phone and went to settings, it will ask you if you would like to “restore to default settings.” What is your life default settings? How do you respond to life? Conflict? People? Certain situations? Let’s talk about it.

I learned something recently. Pain & trauma in your memory has no time line. So until it’s processed and healed, it will feel like it just happened and you go back to that place often. Many even feel through symptoms in the body (stomach pain, for example).

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I’m learning, as I heal, to remind myself that it’s over. The past, pain, nor trauma has no bearing on who I am or who I will be. Trauma doesn’t diminish my worth.

Fight for your healing. It won’t come for you. You must fight for it.

You’re worth it.

Having said that, I am in pursuit of changing my “default setting.” I was talking to someone the other day and I was telling them how I usually respond to conflict-that it was my default setting.

Later, I began to think about that. I didn’t like it.

Don’t I have the power to change? Don’t I have the right to adjust my thinking, my perspective, and my actions? Of course I do.

I’ve added another component to my mental health. It’s call DBT (Dialectical behavior therapy). In my limited understanding (I’ve only been to one class), DBT teaches you coping and management skills. The major thing I’m working on right now is learning how to properly process anxiety. I am determined that anxiety will not run or ruin my life.

I believe that the undercurrent that produces anxiety can be processed and healed. When I say undercurrent, I’m speaking of the pain that is stored in your body. You don’t realize it’s still there, but it doesn’t mean we can’t heal from it. I often wonder where anxiety comes from because, in my mind, I’m not thinking about anything. In many recent instances, I’m having a good time before it shows up. In my mind, this is the undercurrent; a warning of something I need to be aware (but not afraid) of.

I’m not a professional, but I do a lot of reading and researching. I’m a thinker/over thinker. The purpose of this post is to give us another perspective that will hoped lead to answers and healing. And to hopefully have a better understanding regarding what I’m experiencing. It helps me to change my default settings.

No, I don’t want to be restored to my default settings. The default setting have not served me well. I am creating new settings. How about you? Let’s do it!

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Love, Hope & Joy

Hello all! I decided today would be a great day to share an excerpt from my book, Texts from an Angel. Enjoy…

Amy was so depressed. She didn’t want to bother her friends. She knew they were busy. However, after being in bed three days, her guardian angel, Hope, was flustered.

“I hate to bust your angelic wings, but what she needs is a little Joy. No pun intended.” Joy quipped.

“Oh dear heaven!” Hope slapped her wings together in frustration. “Here you are again, in my personal business.”

“You don’t have any personal business. This is all God’s business or did you forget? I keep telling you the Joy of the Lord is where strength comes from.”

“And we also know that ‘hope deferred makes the heart sick.’ That’s why I’m here. So go…” While Hope and Joy are arguing, Amy is holding a bottle of pills. She’s sick of it all.

“Ladies! Ladies!” Love steps in. “Stop it. You’re off focus again. Look.” Amy was pouring a glass of water and had several bottles of pills lined up on the counter. Hope and Joy looked at each other. They knew what to do. Before Amy could reach for the first bottle, a strong wind blew through her kitchen and pills and bottles were flying everywhere!

Conveniently, most of the pills flew down the drain. Amy was so stunned with what was going on around her she didn’t hear her doorbell ringing. Her best friend, Keya, was at the door. After ringing the doorbell for several minutes, Keya decided to use her spare key to get in.

Hearing all the commotion, Kenya rushed to the kitchen. “Amy! What’s the matter? I got your text. Why didn’t you tell me you were so depressed? I’m so sorry I haven’t been here.” Amy was still stunned as she looked at her friend.

“You got a text? I turned my phone off three days ago.” Keya showed her a text message that came from her phone. It read, “I love you, sister, but I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry.”

After a long talk, Keya decided to take Amy home with her until her mother flew into town. Spending time in the nurturing warmth of a mother’s love would help tremendously. She would also seek counseling and formulate a safety plan.

A safety plan is a specific plan you set in place for yourself to ensure your safety whether physical or emotional. The plan usually includes coping mechanism, phone numbers, and maybe personal reminders for you or ways you can distract yourself.  

If you are ever feeling like Amy, please contact either of these numbers:
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Call 1-800-273-8255
Or text: Crisis Text Line: Text RISE to 741741  

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This is an excerpt from my book, Texts from an Angel. You can purchase it at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07QC2GD93/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_BKGPCbDK92FJ3

For a paper copy, email me at nicolesharonwrites@gmail.com

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Stand.

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When I look at this I see tumultuous peace. How did the sky go from being blue to various shades of oranges and red like an angry fire?

Yet, it’s peaceful. It’s saying to me yes, there battle going on behind the scenes. There’s a war being waged. Turmoil. Strife. Confusion.

There’s also victory happening. Peace conquering over turmoil. Harmony happening I’ve strife. Certainty over confusion.

How can this be? How can you have two opposing things going on simultaneously? In the same life?

And yet, like the tower that’s standing, I stand alone. Only I can fight this war within. Only I can stand against the things that stand against me. Yes, there are people and outside forces that encourage, but I must, within myself, make a decision.

I made the decision to stand. Sometimes shaking. Sometimes trembling in fear. Sometimes ready to quit. But there’s a force within me that won’t let me quit. Won’t let me die. Won’t let me give up.

So.
I.
Stand.

And.
I.
Win.

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My view of the sky. Georgia. 10/25/18.

 

 

Anxiety: sick. of. it!

Hey overcomers! How are you?

Am I the only one who’s sick of anxiety? It doesn’t call and ask if it can come over. It doesn’t text. It comes with no warning and I’m sick of it! The irrational thoughts, unexplained irritability, overthinking, lack of concentration, tight muscles… I’M. SICK. OF. IT!

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Yeah…This is how I’m feeling about this.

I wake up every morning expecting to have an anxiety free day, then it shows up. The most frustrating part it is sometimes I’m not aware until I get home and I’m so exhausted I can’t see straight.

Oh, but anxiety, I’m gonna beat you. You are not going get the best of me!

So what’s my plan? You know I have one, right? Well, I think I do. The first part of my plan in to take things one day or moment at a time.

Secondly, I’m researching and asking questions. If you have seen my recent posts and videos, you know that anxiety manifested as intense anger for me late last year which surprised me. I’m researching ways that this thing presents itself so that I can work toward fixing it.

It seems like a lofty goal, but I’m determined that anxiety is not going to rule my life anymore. The more I know, the better I’m equipped to be proactive in fighting it.

Guess what? I’m still an overcomer.

And so are you!

I’ll keep praying. I’ll keep going to counseling. I’ll keep utilizing my community (sigh…I know this is hard).

Thank you for listening to my little rant.

I tell myself the same thing I tell you: “You can do it!”

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Loading…Confidence

 

 

Out for Delivery?

You ever been expecting a package and used the tracking system to see where it is? You get the tracking number and you check the website once or twice a day.

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This is the lot of our lives. When we talk about salvation, which is synonymous with deliverance, that’s our experience. Just to be clear: we are not working toward salvation. We are not working to earn anything from God. He already calls us righteous. He already call us His.

So what is this about? From birth to death, we are a package in transit, and until we reach the end we will always be overcoming, always working, always building to be who God called us to be, always improving on who we are. Think about the person you look up to the most. As wonderful as you know they are, they have things in their life they’re working on. They have struggles too.

So don’t be discouraged. Remember, you’re a package in transit. It looks like this:

You’re born -> You crawl, then walk -> You go to school -> You go to college/work -> Break up # 1 -> Break up # 2, etc. -> Mental Health Issues -> Financial Issues -> Divorce -> Betrayal -> Insecurity -> Family Issues…

You see? There will always be something. But guess what? You have what it takes to overcome it all. We learned it when we watched The Lion King – it’s the circle of life. No one is exempt.

Here’s the assignment: Every time you face something new, think back to the last thing you overcame. You made it through when you didn’t think you would, right? You’ll make it through this one too.

I pray this blessed you. Remember, if you need counseling, go. Utilize your community. And most importantly, Christ is always available. His love is so wide and deep that you will never be able to comprehend it.

Until next time…

 

 

 

💙Happy Birthday to Me!💙

Good evening everyone!

It’s my birthday and I am so excited! God has been so good to me, and I am thankful for my life!

As you all know, the past six months or so has been blah! But thanks to (you know my motto) Christ, Community and Counseling, I am so much better. So much so, that I wrote a book! Yes ma’am, yes sir! I wrote a book!

I’ll tell you why this is so important. In the midst of the past months, there were days I didn’t know about my mind. Yes, I was able to go to work, and I functioned, but my thoughts and my mind were a jumbled mess.

On the other side of it, I wrote a book in three weeks! I do have a book that I’ve been working on for two years regarding my journey, but this story pushed its way out of me! It almost startled me!

I’m telling you this because I am in awe of the goodness of God. The creativity that I’ve experienced recently is one I’ve ever experienced before.

So what’s the point? I’m glad you asked. Sometimes at the end of your worst season, you experience something you’ve never experienced before. I’m calling it “remodel of God.” God doesn’t just put you back together, he puts you back better than you were before!

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If you’d like a copy of my book, Texts by an Angel, follow this link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07QC2GD93/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_BKGPCbDK92FJ3IG

In commemoration with my new book, Texts by an Angel, I am starting a texting campaign. You will receive an encouraging text once a week.
Here is your opt-in link: https://slkt.io/MoH
-or- text angeltext to 31991.
Reply STOP to cancel, HELP for help. Msg & data rates may apply.

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Hey! Where You Been?

Hey guys!

I’m getting back in the swing of things. I’ve been out of commission for a while, but I’m back and I’m focusing. Instead of trying to write everything out, I thought I’d do a video. I hope that something is said to help you on your journey to healing and wholeness.

We’re in this together!

Blessings to you!